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3 min read Octopus

The Octopus and the Lie of Balance

Balance isn’t real. Just a bunch of tentacles pulling in opposite directions while you pretend to be fine.
The Octopus and the Lie of Balance

The Decision-Making Octopus, Part V

Read The Decision-Making Octopus — an 8-part series about internal chaos, emotional sabotage, and showing up anyway.
Explore the full series →
← Part IV: The Octopus in Charge

You were told balance was the goal.

Get enough sleep.
Be productive but not busy.
Be present but ambitious.
Parent well. Partner well. Provide.
Don’t burn out. Don’t shut down.
Breathe.

The Octopus heard all of that and said:

Cool. I’ll build a system for that.

The Productivity Cult Trap

The Octopus loves systems.

So it makes colour-coded calendars.
It reads articles on time-blocking.
It watches YouTube videos about morning routines and buys three notebooks it’ll never fill.

Because deep down, it believes this:

If I can just do everything right, I’ll finally feel okay.

This belief is a virus.
It feels logical. It feels responsible.
It’s actually panic dressed as structure.

Life as a Spreadsheet

Balance, according to the Octopus, is a perfectly optimised life:

  • Mornings for deep work
  • Afternoons for presence
  • Evenings for family
  • Weekends for slow joy
  • Monthly check-ins for alignment
  • Quarterly reviews for legacy
  • Annual resets for vision

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